"Welcome wrestling fans to the match of the century! In one corner we have the reigning champion, Big Daddy D, weighing at a massive 191 pounds. In the other corner is the returning challenger, Little E, weighing at 18 pounds."
"Fans, don't let that weigh difference fool you. Little E's has got some incredible dexterity, flexibility, and agility. All that equals problems for Big Daddy D whose got none of those."
"The match has begun! Little E is being carried to the changing table. Big Daddy D looks confident...maybe too confident."
"She's down on the table. Look at her go! Before Big Daddy's hand are off of her, she's flipping over, making it impossible for Big Daddy to get to the diaper straps! What a move! Big Daddy's determined, he's picked her up and flipped her on her back again."
"Little E's making the move again, reaching her right hand over to grab the railing of the changing table, then using that anchor to swing her right leg over thus twisting her body over. Fans, don't discount that grip she has on the railing. She might be small but she's got a one 'kung-fu' grip there."
"Big Daddy's got her flipped over again. Little E's using another tactic, tears. Boy can she belt out a cry. Look at Big Daddy back off. Bad move on his part, fans, now that he's back off Little E has flipped over and is on her hands and knees. At this rate that dirty diaper is going to stay oh so dirty!"
"Look at Little E, the tears have stopped and she's trying to stand on changing table. Big Daddy better get in there if he doesn't want to have to deal with a diaper rash."
"Big Daddy looks like he's got a second wind. He's flipped Little E back over and is now holding her down with his left arm as his right hand is quickly unfastening the diaper. Little E does not like this, it looks like she's gonna try the "tear tactic" again. Big Daddy's got the diaper off. It's just wet. What's this, fans, he's releasing Little E from his grip? Smart Daddy! He's leading Little E into a false sense of security."
"Fresh diaper is out! What is this? Fans, it looks like Big Daddy is trying to put on the diaper with Little E on all fours. That is not working out. I take back what I said about Big Daddy being smart!"
"Fans, if Big Daddy can just get Little E on her back he can secure that fresh diaper. Over the months he certainly has gotten faster in securing that thing. Oh look at that! Little E's back over. Why isn't she crying? Big Daddy gave her something to chew on! The tactic worked! Little E's been distracted from the match! Like some kind of rapid thing Big Daddy's got the fresh diaper on and secured!"
"Ladies and gentlemen, the match is over! Big Daddy D still reigns!"

